Hey folks, sorry I haven't written this week. It's like the old saying, "when it rains it pours" It's been so bad I'm not even getting to the Pub on time for my daily "Vitamin G" infusion! But as I look across our virtually empty office, check and see if my watch is still ticking, and realize there is still another three hours in the workday, ...but there is no one here to work! I guess my whole office is having a "bad week". But I'm the "old trooper" who stays on the job until quittin' time.
No applause please!!
So what's up for the weekend? Well tomorrow I guess I'll try my newest hobby, (sleeping in til 7am) since I don't have to go to work. Then a leisurely breakfast (eight or ten cups of coffee), perhaps go "shopping" with the wife,....but then again,...well we'll see on that one. Cruise the book store and see what's new, maybe "piddle around" on my computer and try and figure out how to "secure" my new wireless access point thing, pop by the pub for a pint, maybe get a movie, relax and go to bed.
Then again maybe I'll go rent a Harley, cut the sleeves off my shirt, get a tatoo and go for a ride. (NOT!!!) A friend of mine offered to sell me thier Harley, it's a 2004 Sportster with virtually no miles on it, for $7,500. (I'm thinking about it!)
Or maybe I'll go down to the docks, see if I can get a slot on one of the sport fishing party boats and go out in the Gulf of Mexico and see what I can catch for dinner. ($150 for a slot, three hours out, three hours back, if it's really rough seas it's puking all the way, about two hours "on-spot",... naw, it's a lot easier to go to the fish store and get some, and a lot cheaper too!
Or maybe I'll just go tourist and drive around town taking left turns with my right turn signal on, hit the restaurants all day and steal sugar and salt and pepper packets, complain about the food and get even more off to keep me from making an "old fart" scene, hit the clothing store and look for a flaw of any kind or a loose buttin and then demand a 40% discount for "shoddy" products. Then I can go to a local sports bar scream and yell and swear for some college football team, scoff a few free beers from fans who think I'm with them. "Man they are killing us, we need to kick some serious butt here,....oh man look at that, that's aggrevated assualt, not a tackle, ...call it ref, call it,.. you blind mo****-f****r" Shit I lost my wallet, anyone spot me a beer til I can go out to the car?"
Or maybe go and "lurk" at Starbucks. Man, whoever had the balls to charge those prices for a cup of coffee, now there's a dude with steel balls! It's only coffee, get over it!!!
Speaking of get over it, someone just came through the office to tell us that for $25 you can go down to the local drug store and get a flu shot, while they last! Now you say something like that and it's the senior set's feeding frenzy. "I was in line before you and I'm sicker than you." Listne you old battle axe you want to see sick look at the size of my joints from the arthritis. I'd slug you but my osteoperosis would cause all the bones in my hand to shatter!"
Oh boy, the sleeping in and going shopping with my wife is looking better and better. (As long as she doesn't get into the shoe department! I swear I could put shoes on half the women in China with just what's in her closet! (Ok, by now you've figured it out that she doesn't know my "blog" name, and Annonymous (a/k/a my daughter) if you tell her you are no longer in my will and I'll become a Rastufarian!
God, I've only killed a half hour here in my cubicle! Maybe I'll re-arrange my cubicle,...naw theat would make the guy in the next one happy. He hates that I LOVE the "handsfree mode" on my phone. this way I can continue working, occasionally mutter a "Yup, I know exactly what you're saying", or be able to give my callers a two handed "bird" knowing they can't see me. Ooops! Just noticed my "message waiting" light is on, ...hang on I'll be right back.
Just as client's secretary wanting me to tell her how to get an extra cable tv hookup done for her boss. (real answer? Get off your ass and call around and find out yourself. Don't ask some poor thing you barely pay enough to pay her bills and eat to find out how you can get something for you oceanfront "weekend place" while she has to sit home and sweat with not even air-conditioning! Sorry, I tend to rant at this type of shit!
got to go,
-30-
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2 comments:
Mr. G,
You crack me up!!
Have fun shopping with your wife. That's what I'm doing tomorrow too, except no shoes... just nursing scrubs (again).
Must be a woman thing :).
But hey, look on the bright side... you can get a new ball cap?
I either vote for ripping your sleeves off and becoming a biker or the Rastifarian. :P I think a lot of people have had long/bad weeks. I'm happy that it's over. Happy Veterans Day!!
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