Ooooooooommmmm, Ooooooooommmmmm!

Ok I got that 100th blog stuff out of my system so we'll start 101 with a new commitment to all of you, a new attitude, a new year, and an older (but newer) me!
First a challenge to all of you. What do you want to know about? Shit, in 62 years I've picked up a couple of things, led an interesting, albeit "un-wealthy" life, and as my darling wife of 40 years this June always says "You have an opinion on everything, but you're not always right!"
If I were a little younger,...no forget it, I'm gonna do it anyhow. I'm going to go hi-tech again and put a "web-cam" up and try this instant messenger stuff. I'll let you know when I get it done and how to "buzz me" or whatever it is you do to IM someone.
On to newer and better things. With the two deaths of friends this past fall I found mnyself slipping into a tad of a depression. Partly my age, partly my diet and exercise programs, (Ahem, WHAT diet and exercise programs? We'll talk later honey, and I'll prove to you Guinness is one of the major food groups.) And probably partly because I've always know your parnets are supposed to die before you, same with Aunts, Uncles, Grand-parents, etc. Hell I even knew that some buddies would die before me, that odd disease that never should have gotten them, that stupid war that they should have come marching home from after it was over, and yes even that tragic car accident, swimming accident, and other oddball things that happen. But I guess I really felt my local "buddies" would all make it through til some time later. My diet (I know wrong choice of word) went to hell. Some days I'd just have some peanut butter and crackers in the evening, that was all for the day. I had a hell of a time deciding to throw back the covers and get up, in fact for a guy who loves getting up at 5am I was tuning into a real sleep until fifteen minutes before you're due in the office, skip lunch or any other "time out" during the day, hit the Pub about 4:30 pm and have several Guinness watch the talking sports heads on the tube, go home and crash with a glass of wine, and hit the bead by 9 p.m. (I guess that qualifies as depressed!)
But Tra-da! It's all over, done, out with the trash, history, etc. I got pissed at myself because I knew I was being an asshole, to everyone, in a real universal manner. My wife was beginning to worry and told me go talk to the Doctor (against my personal philosophy. I got my ass in this position I have to get my ass out of it, and I'm sure as shit not going to some doctor who will most likely have either of two solutions; a) "take this prescription to the drug store, and take....", or door number 2 b) "I'm going to refer you to Doctor Wacko-fixer , he's outstanding in this area of ......."
Not even NO, but HELL NO! Thinking back over my life I started looking for times I was at peace with my self and my life, and enjoyed life. Start ruling out the ridiculous times (No, too old to go join the Navy again and know the next four years are guaranteed pay, healthcare, dental care, traveling around, and then there was the ,...oh shit, Icouldn't live on that kind of money today!) Think about the "Gung ho" and decisions and my decision making processes of twenty years ago (shit that won't work either I can't be living on Spaghettio's and twinkies for months at a time because I knew eventually I could make the business work, I'd wind up with a bloody ulcer!) Oh wait a minute, there was the time I started getting a regular massage. That helped bigtime. I would just let go and let the masseuse work her magic and BAM, kinks and knots all gone, bones turned to jelly, my mind the consistency of warm applesauce and empty of worries, ideas, or concerns. Hmmm, that's do-able, to a degree, maybe only every other week or once a month, but it's a start. So I make a call, schedule an appointment, and Voila!, My body is beginning to thank me. About an hour after the massage I realized I was hungry. First time in a couple of months where eating was a chore and a seemingly waste of time exercise that had occured. So how can I crank this up a little more without having to re-mortgage the house to pay for daily massages or divorce my wife and marry a masseuse! (A little fuzzy logic there folks, but I got over it!)
Then I remembered I used to "meditate" and it also was relaxing. I went upstairs to "the pit", started pawing over my old cassette tapes, CD's, etc. looking for my old meditation music. Then I remebered a book I had bought on TM (Trancendental Meditation, YUP, the same stuff the Beatles did in I think it was '67 when they went to India or Bengaladash looking for the Maharishi dude. Oh wait, this is 2006! Google knows everything so I fire up the old 'puter , hit google and type in "TM" (Shit, also the initials for the term "Trademark"!) Back to full term "Transendental Meditation". Woo-woo, dozens of sites, so like in the old war movies "cover me, I'm going in". A half hour later I got a telephone number off the website, (After digesting the dozens of pages of evidence, testimonies etc.) and I call. "Hi , We're sorry we missed your call, but if you'll.....", so I do, figuring I'll maybe get a call back in six weeks or so. An hour later the phone rings and poof! It's a live person. (By now I've hit a dozen more web sites and found a number of "new and exciting" breakthrough technologies that supposedly accomplish the same thing and was in the midst of checking them out.) I begin talking with this guy and we are chatting along fine and come to find out he is an authorized instructor of TM, lives only 20 miles away from me, and invites me over to explore it more on Wednesday (this is now Friday evening, two glasses of wine into "deep research") I remember last time I was checking out TM about eight years ago there was a fee of $400-$500 for the instruction, so I ask, "Ahh excuse me I'm sure there is a charge for this wonderful training on TM technique, so about how much are we talking? (I'm ready for the $695-$795 inflation upgrade price)
"Well there's no charge for the first meeting and we'll evaluate the reasons you want to learn TM. Then if you are really comitted to make it a part of your life the next step is five meeting in a two week period and we will have you meditating on your own after that, for the rest of your life."
"Hmmm, yes I understand, but how much?"
"Well it's a financial committment of $2500,...but that's all you will ever have to pay, and you'll be meditating for the rest of your life!"
"Ah sounds good, why don't you call me on Tuesday and let me see if I can clear my schedule for next Wednesday to meet with you (NOT!)"
Back to the Web for a better look at the "new technological breakthroughs".
The usual "NLP"(Neuro-lingustic programing") stuff is still around Sort of the "subliminal messaging" stuff. A coded "affirmation" embedded within the sixty-four piece symphonic music. Then there was the "neutral affirmation programs", anoither form of affirmation within a background of constant static that your mind hears but your ear doesn't. Then the plain old affirnmation tapes ( sort of a "you love yourself, you respect yourself, you love others and you respect thier decisions as well" (sort of the "Write 'I'm a shit head' six hundred times on the blackboard type training.)
Then I found this outfit out of Oregon somewhere (lot of that stuff going on out on the west coast). They had this "Holosync Solution" program on CD's,(by now glass #2 of the "smart and raspberryish"Australian Shiraz has mellowed my approach to life, lowered my skepticism, and boosted my curiosity, "Aw What the hell, I'll order it on line" (See how depressed I must have been to buy something on-line from someone I don't know and worse yet with a credit card (it did have a one year money back guarantee!), so I took the plunge.
I started using it about six days ago and my mind is really clearing up and my attitude is really starting to look up big time. I am less anxious, seem to be making more orderly progress, don't let anything bother me as much as it used to, and I'm up in the early hours again! (5:30 this morning!)
Best description I can give you is it's a half hour Stereo CD I listen to through headphones, to a contiuopus track of what sounds like a summer rain on a tin roof with you sitting under the roof on the front porch, oh and to spice it up a bit , there are like bells, or gongs, the kind you hear from Nepal, etc. with random sounds and spacing.
The whole point is obviously the same sort of "subliminal" thing, but is using sounds to move your brainwaves out of the "regular day" level into the three lower levels like sleep, while you stay conscious. At some levels you are more free to be creative than the "day to day level " of consciuosness, etc.
I'll keep you posted, but thus far it is working. I have another full week of using this CD, and then I add another CD to it and go from a 30 minute meditation to a sixty minute and drop down a couple of levels of consciousness to a clearer and better understanding of myself and my stressors, or something like that.
(No I haven't gone crazy, and yes I REALLY do feel more peaceful and balanced, and if any of you is into any form of this type of "meditation" please let me know.
Have a great day! Time to go the the "Christmas Party" I mentioned in my last blog
Peace and calm, life is short, eat dessert first!
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